BabyFirst TV and other shit : The Rant | Part 5
So then, this morning I had went channel surfing because there was nothing on nor was there anything interesting on arirang. So of course, I go channel surfing just to find the absolute bullshit known as BabyFirst, and so it begins...
BabyFirst?
Ok, For those of you who don't have babies/toddlers/children, It’s basically a channel that has baby shows, It has been criticized for making your babies dumber, If you just searched up "babyfirst rant" on google, You would see some videos that are basically those cheap rants. But if you go to the next page, You get a rant from some guy with tourettes, A reddit post of someone venting about this show, and a news article from around 2006..
So anyways, Let's start!
This is basically in the order of the TV shows i see..
Ok so My patient, "harry the bunny" wanted to have a therapy session with me and she seemed like a pretty useless patient.. I told her to get some rest!
So anyways, Let's start!
This is basically in the order of the TV shows i see..
"Harry The Bunny"
A therapy session for what?Ok so My patient, "harry the bunny" wanted to have a therapy session with me and she seemed like a pretty useless patient.. I told her to get some rest!
"The Notekins"
What do you get when you put 7 little midgets that are supposed to represent music notes but instead are slaves? The notekins.. Oh yes... They all do everything at once, I think this could have some connections to the illuminati, They're slaves..
They have no freedom, They must do everything at once.. That's why every episode is the same, Only one thing changes.. Just like every other babyfirst show..
They get a letter from an instrument, They follow a path and get blocked by an obstacle that they have to solve by playing their music the way you're supposed to play said instrument.. and then, you get to the instrument which these notekins start to show off their skill
"Honk Toot and Swo-Swoosh"
No comment..
"Wonder Box"
This is a weird show about a box..
The first thing i see are four cows standing backwards on pogo stiks, The stick looks like it's jammed up their ass..
Then there is this part where something eats up a rectangle to make a shape of a fucking giraffe.
In which the girraffe bounces onto that shape..
Then there are three doors, A small door contained a sub, A mid door contained that same sub, and the big door contained the sub.. again, A meatball sub for nothing?
And then, We have the zipper skit where there is a snow hat with a half-butterfly and a half-alarm clock.
And then that's all i see
"Playtime with AL"
This is basically BabyFirst's newest thing; It's basically about a mentally challenged sock-puppet that tries to solve riddles for you and sometimes even takes your requests, If you're lucky enough, Your request might even be done on TV..
They also somehow stole the "We Did It" song from dora the explorer..
Commercial Break
Ok so the commercial break is in...
Basically, up next is "Mio Mao, GooGoo and Hide&Seek(FOR ACORN!)"
Right now, It is a pretty weird channel..
What's interesting is that back in 2011, Dish had removed "BabyFirst" just to replace it with the inferior "BabyTV" and my god, Many angry parents complained.. It eventually returned by the end of 2011 with BabyTV still on there...
Hide&Seek
But not the Hide&Seek where you get to hide..
It's basically about two squirrel-looking objects with square heads, One that looks like rudolph the red nosed quirrel.
You hide the acorn in an obvious spot, and you have to wait for your opponent to walk to it.., As soon as you are standing directly towards the acorn, you just clap just to know that it is right where he is standing. Then the opponent must hide the acorn on the opposing side and you must do the same thing again..
Very boring indeed.. They even named them "Sammy"+"Eve".. Game over?
MIOMAO
Apparently this show was by the same creators of Bert&ErniesGreatAdventures, (Misseri Studios) These two cats can basically form into anything from clay, I think it's a decent enough show.. I honestly have no comment here..
GooGoo
A.K.A "Kofi"..
This show is about a blue-baby in a void i call "The Outer Lands" who draws a blob that comes to life... The blob then forms into a specific object and shows him some tricks he can do,. There is not much he can do here, It's pretty boring and bland..
He falls asleep with the blob eventually..
Also, there are no credits in the end-scene (Where credits are supposed to be).. I do not know why they did this for..
Another commercial break?
I'm guessing this is time for another commercial break, Will be back..
YoYo&Peanut
This show is basically about opposing clowns that can never go together..
Keep in mind that this show has these disclaimers that pop up on your screen as i dub "QuickTips." or "KipTips".. You should probably gather these tips.
I'm not doing the rest..
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